Fragile

"I no longer want to be called your ex-girlfriend, your past woman, potentially interesting, also potentially uninteresting. Now, I was a girl who had been permanently cherished and damaged by life. I want to be someone to be handled carefully only by you."

–Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, Only by you)

Journal Date: 12.30.23 

Can you go wherever I go?

"Today, I woke up at 2 AM, pushed to sleep again, and wished that you were here to hold me."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, can you go wherever I go?)
Journal Date: 12.27.2023

First Christmas!

"We both know that Christmas this year is way more different from what we have experienced before. We long that it's not about having hugs and kisses from our families. Not about taking pictures of your lovely mom as she poses for memories. Not about my sleeping habit under the warm Christmas tree. 

Because it's about cuddling around, watching a movie, watching me play with the game you used to explore. It's about wishing for time to stop as we realize that we will be spending the next Christmas with each other's warmth. It's about wrapping each other with our warm hugs and feeling our arms because that's exactly where we belong."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, First Christmas!)

Journal Date: 12.25.2023

Under the same sheet

"How I wish I always sit with you as I forget the outside world still goes round. Get crazy with you even if we're just in the four-cornered room. Chuckle with our jokes through our dirty language. Do my work as you play behind me. Sing at the top of our lungs while dancing until our body needs to cling to each other. 

How I wish we always cuddle under the same sheet, loving each other's heartbeat, and hearing your voice as you say you love me."

—Jhunamae Moja (Smnllyl, under the same sheet)
Journal Date: 12.20.2023

Princess

"I will always miss your hug when I get your home from work. Your warm hands that always want to intertwine mine. The wrap of your arms all the way around my shoulders, press your face into my hair while my body curves over yours. Your arms became a set of parentheses bracing the sweetest and dirtiest phrase I could ever tell. Your care makes me shiver as you lay me on your bed, caressing all my worries and sadness in this world. Where it feels like we are disappearing from this world as you carry me like a princess you could ever hold."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, Princess)
Journal Date: 12.20.2023

You

"You know what my thoughts are at this very moment? I share this love with three people— my best friend, my soulmate, and my future husband. It's funny 'coz they're all you."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, you)
Journal Date: 12.19.23 '5:45 AM'

Coffee

"I know that coffee is all well but I look forward to having kisses from your lips every morning." (12.04.23)

(This entry came true!)

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, coffee)

Journal Date: 12.16.23

WFH hugs

"Even if we are underneath the same blanket, cuddling while I brush your soft hair— I still miss you in a quite desperate way."

—Jhunamae Moja (Smnllyl,WFH hugs)

Journal Date: 12.15.23

Bbtm!

From
"Seems I must always write you letters that I can never send".

To
 "I could kiss you whenever I can".

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl,bbtm 🎓)
Journal Date: 12.12.2023

All of me

"Please be clingy with me. Get worried if I don't text you back in 10 minutes. Just send me a message whenever you miss me and can't hold it anymore. Better hold my hand tight and kiss me whenever you want, wherever we go. Tell me you miss me and you love me all the time. But also, I want you to trust me. Because if I am dating you, that means I bet everything on you. As I mean it, as I long to be with you again, I will keep on finding you from crowds of nobody because I am all yours. You are mine. End of story. "

-Jhunamae Moja (Smnllyl, all of me)

Journal Date: 12.06.2023

Hope

"I've been in cloudy thoughts seven days straight now and you are my sun— even if it's 6 PM."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl, Sunshine)
Journal Date: 12.04.23

You're back!

"It's the same feeling of not seeing you for 7 years of fallout and not seeing you for 7 days being out of town. I miss you. No difference." 

—Jhunamae Moja (Smnllyl, three best kisses)
Journal Date: 12.04.2023

Happiness to craziness

"You're my kind of crazy."

—Jhunamae Moja(Smnllyl,blue)

JD: 12.02.2023