"It's comforting to know that you safely landed in your mom's hometown. I feel happy whenever you visit her, knowing you spent time with the first woman you ever loved. I feel happy staying in this town keeping one of your dearest promises of going back. I was happy for you without any pinch of hurt.
I was happy...
Until I saw the sweetest video you could ever leave me in this moment of being away with you.
And let me tell you these...
Let me tell you that I don't miss you even if I really do.
Let me laugh whenever I tell you to don't go back anymore even if I would die for it in secret.
Let me tell you how I wait for you here happily even if every hour of thinking you were miles away is like hell.
Let me show you that distance is nothing in between my longing for your hugs and kisses.
Let me tell you that it's easy not to see you whenever I want to. It was easy until my first cry tonight.
So let me tell you all of these... So that it won't hurt that much because I really miss you. I really do.
I am writing you all of these in between my tears in my pillow. Your video is playing a thousand times now, I paused the video when you were telling me that you're gonna miss me, how you'll stick with me whatever happens, how much you love me, and you were daydreaming about your future with me.
I was happy. And now, I am happier.
So let me tell you all of these... So that this video is nothing but something to keep till we get old."
-Jhunamae Moja (Smnnlyl, LMTYT)
Journal Date: 02.05.2024
